The Billionaire App

[patent pending!] Billionaire App: Cost is $0.99 per year for this app plus a 3.5-4.5% fee for cost savings based on me talking you out of spending money, and giving the amount a millionaire or billionaire would have spent on his/her purchase into a savings account or a non-profit. So, when said Money Bags is […]

War against pillows

While most sane people agree with me that socks are an unnecessary impingement on our sensibilities and freedoms, a recent post in www.thewirecutter.com fried my waffles deeply.  There are people on earth who rate pillows from good to great, from poor to superlative, from fluffy to lumpy.  I thank Darwin every goddamn day that I […]

Why, Coffeetables?

We do not need coffeetables. It’s the same lie told to us years ago, that we need to wait one hour after eating before we go swimming because we’d seize up and die like a toy with a dead battery, or that we need to eat three times a day, or that there’s some being […]

New apartment

I wuz torn between three apartments to rent, and finally settled on a gorgeous oceanfront condo in the 50s on Collins in Miami Beach, called “OMG Cheese, I Luv It, LOL.”  A very large pool, tennis courts, and illegal immigrant shooting range. Around the bend from the Fontainebleau Hilton, the 40-story pyramid-shaped “I Can’t, I’m […]

Fastest way around the one dollar bill

In my illustrious motorcycle racing career, equaled or surpassed by only select few hundreds of thousands of individuals in the past hundred years or so, the most shocking, enjoyable but counterintuitive skill is known as countersteering.  On a track with let’s say 14 corners, the faster and fastest way in and out of cornering two […]

instances

the instances of cigarette smoking…well, I re-watched “Miller’s Crossing” with Gabriel Byrne, directed by the Coen Brothers, and it’s such a fun movie, grabbed a cigarette and a glass of ice, poured some blended scotch, and watched along with the wit and violence and business scheming. Yesterday, I watched “Dead Man Down” with another Irisher, […]